Hurricane Victims' Grief: How Can You Help?

We may never know how many people hurricaneRETENTION. "I can't even think," one victim told a
Katrina killed. But we know this: The victims areCNN journalist. If you can't think it's hard to frame
going through double grief. They grieve for thesentences and communicate ideas. Background
family members and friends who have diednoise makes things harder. Who could concentrate
(post-death grief), for missing loved ones, andin a crowd of 10,000 people?HEALTH CHANGES.
countless losses to come, a process calledMany victims were dehydrated when the relif
anticipatory grief.What is anticipatory grief? It's aworkers found them, according to news reports.
feeling of loss before a death or dreaded eventSome victims, those who swam or waded
occurs. Katrina had both parts of this definitionthrough toxic water, have developed skin
and was a dreaded event that killed thousands.problems. Kids may have stomach aches,
As the victims' losses increase their anticipatoryheadaches, loss of appetite, nightmares, and sleep
grief will also increase. If you had to summarizeproblems. Adults and kids are just plain
their lives with one word it would beexhausted.SLEEP PROBLEMS. The victims
uncertainty.Everything is up for grabs.John S.stranded on rooftops had to be constantly alert
Rolland, author of "Living Beyond Loss: A Death inand got no sleep. Victims housed in shelters got
the Family," says the emotions associated withno sleep, little sleep, or interrupted sleep. Sleep
anticipatory grief are intense. What's more, theseproblems alter their perception, thinking, behavior,
emotions can be total opposites, such as hopeand the ability to solve problems.FEELING
and despair. Katrina's victims are on emotionalDISCONNECTED AND ALONE. Trauma has
overload. No wonder they have most of thecaused hurricane victims and relief workers to
symptoms of anticipatory grief. Here are some offeel disconnected. Some think they've been
their symptoms.DENIAL. You hear denialforgotten. But they're not forgotten. Americans
sentences on television and radio every day. "Gulfand people around the globe are coming to their
Coast residents are used to hurricanes." "Weaid. You can help by:* Learning about anticipatory
thought we could ride out the storm." "The [flood]grief. Once you know about it you'll understand its
water will go down soon." The problem with denialpower over the hurricane victims.* Contributing to
is that it can kill you.EMOTIONAL NUMBNESS.AmeriCares, the American Red Cross, the
Some victims are so traumatized they have aSalvation Army, and religious groups that are
"flat affect" and display little emotion. Their facesproviding relief.
are blank and their body language is minimal. It'sEvery contribution is welcome.* Donating new
as if Katrina wrung everything out ofclothing - not used - to relief organizations. Make
them.NERVOUS BEHAVIOR. The hurricane victimssure the size is listed on all items. Tie socks and
are nervous because they've lost control of theirshoes together.* Donating blankets, sheets, pillow
lives. Who wouldn't be nervous? Kids arecases and pillows to relief organizations.* Donating
expressing their nervousness with hyper behavior,personal care items - toothbrushes, toothpaste,
crying, or clinging.ANXIETY AND DREAD. Katrina'ssoap, shampoo, combs, makeup - to relief
victims ask themselves the same question everyorganizations.* Asking your kids to give some of
day: What will happen next? Kids may feartheir gently used books and games to relief
another disaster, according to The National Childorganizations.* Donating art supplies. Young
Traumatic Stress Network. Unfortunately,children have limited vocabularies, so they
weather forecasts may reinforce thiscommunicate through art. Instead of donating
fear.CHOKED FEELING IN THE THROAT. Somecoloring books, donate blank paper, crayons and
hurricane victims cry easily, others hide theiror water color markers so kids can express their
feelings because they must be strong for theirexperiences and feelings.* Sharing your expertise.
families. So they live with a choked feeling in theirThe American Red Cross and the National
throats. Besides, if they start crying they mightInstitute of Mental Health need health experts in a
not be able to stop.CONSTANT SADNESS. Robertvariety of fields. Visit their Websites for more
Veniga, MD, author of "A Gift of Hope: How Weinformation on volunteer needs.* Sharing your
Survive Our Tragedies," says the victims ofhome. Contact to work out details.* Listening to
tragedy often believe things are going to getvictims' stories. If you share your home or if
worse. "Their lives are governed by fears," hehurricane victims move to your community, take
writes, "perhaps a fear that they can never againthe time to listen to their stories. Your gift of
find happiness."DEPRESSION. Suriving Katrina waslisteing will ease their burdens and help them to
hard enough, but now the victims have to facesee a brighter future.Copyright 2005 by Harriet
their losses and build new lives. Building a new lifeHodgson. To learn more about her work go to
takes courage and physical stamina, two thingsHodgson has been a nonfiction writer for 27
that may be in short supply at the moment. Theyears and is a member of the Association of
result is depression.ANGER. Kids feel insecurity,Health Care Journalists. Her latest book, "Smiling
anxiety, sadness, unfairness, anger and more,Through Your Tears: Anticipating Grief," written
according to the National Child Traumatic Stresswith Mayo Clinic psychiatrist Dr. Lois Krahn, is
Network. For information on kids' reactions toavailable from Hodgson has donated copies of the
disaster visit their Website at and click onbook to her local Red Cross chapter.
"Terrorism and Disaster."POOR CONCENTRATION